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Then the issue is something to do with the mod I guess
so apparently I forgor to mention I had a datapack installed on my server which ISNT EVEN COMPATIBLE WITH FORGE and if I had at least the one singular braincell required to remember and compute such a thing I wouldn't be REFRESHING THIS PAGE FOR HOURS DESPRATE FOR A SOULTION, AN EXUSE TO NOT TOUCH GRASS. somebody pls close this thread.
Then the issue is something to do with the mod I guess
Well, ok then. The mod was the reason that I couldn't update to 1.19 too 
Does the version of the mod match? Do you face the same issue in a vanilla server?
No, the issue is not present in a vanilla server
You should try removing few mods and/or install performance mods, which should help reduce lag on the server as your only getting 1-3 tps
I only have one mod installed, and the problem with the server isn't that it is laggy, the problem is that it keeps timing me out every time I try to play.
I do have the exact same mod version, and by lag I mean that all entities are frozen in place like they have no ai, blocks don't drop, eating is impossible, buttons take 20min to update, and any item dropped on the ground will vanish into thin air.
I tried to afk to wait out the lag, I tried save and quitting, I tried restarting, and I tried messing with my wifi proxy or something.
This problem didn't arise with hypixel or any other server and even a world download of my server is extremely laggy, only 1-3 tps. Here is the log https://mclo.gs/4ZnAOlA
This is probably a bug in Forge or MCF mod as everything for 1.19 is in a really early state.
I'd recommend you to report this to the mod creator.
Thanks for the info!
